To resolve, whats been resolved, is resolved.

I'm drinking some Hot Chocolate, wondering what kind of clothes I want from Wal-Mart.

I might get a cheapo outfit and some shoes. Yeah and maybe some make-up?

My nephews are over, they remind me why I'm NOT ready to be a parent. I say parent, cause anyone and I mean anyone can become a Mother or Father, but its more then just a name to be a Parent.

Also I think my sister also regrets having kids so young (20 and 21) and often feels like she has to have weekly "breaks".
Well this year she is not going to have as much as the previous year. At least with me babysitting whenever she felt the need to go out all night. Personally I don't know of any mother who wants so much time away from her kids. Though I am sure some do.

I have nothing intellegent to share. I don't feel like blogging about Celebrities now..I dunno. I am sure there are a zillion things I could go on about. But I don't or rather can't think of a thing.
Things, thats all thoughts are. Ha.

I'm chatting with Makris* and Adhill. Thom and Tony are not online or not replying. I need more friends. I feel I need a real, true friend. Anybody interested? Anyone???

I'm going to list my New Year's Resolution in advance to work on it earlier.

1.Weight Loss- I have to shed some weight I piled over the years and the weight just looks gross, or at least I think so. Man, I could've had this weight issue problem under control YEARS ago, and chose to put it off. By December 2010 I will weight between 110-120lbs. I will not be a fat 23.

2.Learn to respect myself more- Every, and I do mean every year I fail at this some way or another. I have the worse self esteem, and I don't know how that even started. I have one good, dear, patient friend who tries endlessly to get me to have more self-respect. I should take more positive remarks to heart then the negative ones. So I will try my damnest to do so. Just for them and of course more importantly myself.

3.Get my grade 12- I dropped out of school, after being expelled and never took education serious again. Until recently I want my Grade 12. I deserve my High School education alot.

4. Keep up daily with a journal/blog/Writing -This is something I must do daily and not randomly. I will buy a journal for the year and write in it. Of course that one will have more private stuff and only the people, I trust most completely, can read it. And I will complete one poem a week, one short story monthly and work more on my other stories.

5. Be more open to others- This something I really need to work on for some people, other not so much. I need to let people who actually care in and not be worried about how odd I will appear. I'm just human. I don't know why I have troubles with that.

6.Advoid the TV and Computer as much as possible- I need to spend less time on the Computer and TV and more time in a book or painting or one of my forgetten pasttimes have a thing where I need sound. Problem is I need noise. I cannot express this odd need of mine. And other time I need complete slience. I'm a weird one.

I'm not going to make a huge ass list just, just what I have and I will strive for them to be met.

Treymae and Makris are putting much into this...well the weight loss. I have good positive feeling I will have my Mind, Spirit and Body back in 2010. I think a lot of changes will happen for me in 2010. I just can't wait for the New Year.


Now I'm drinking a Jones: Berry Lemonade and about to eat dinner. I'm also considering to stop biting my nails and hacking off my hair. When my hair is straight it touches my lower back, just above my behind.

Ah so many changes and all I can do is just smile.


Until next time.



*Real peoples names have been changed for private reasons.